this week our dear, elderly neighbor with recurrent cancer
made the lonely decision to end his life.
since hearing this very sad news,
intermittent thoughts of him continue to come to mind
I feel pain for his loneliness and suffering.
I feel sorrow for his wife, children and grandchildren that are left behind.
I feel we in medicine somehow failed him
by not realizing how afraid he was,
how affected he was by his cancer diagnosis
as it reared its ugly head again,
after seemingly being beaten back by chemo.
he did not see any relief from the pain
only the eventual outcome
death, in small steps.
he wanted a say over the when and where…
had he only known another way
to relieve his pain…
he might have chosen it.
I am praying for our friend and his family…
without him, life will never be the same but it can still be good…
as husband, dad and grandpa
he would want it that way.
RIP dear friend…